Stuck in the middle

I was out last night as a mate from Los Angeles was out and we went to this Brazilian Party at Slide which was out of control, i had not been out of the scene for ages so i took the opportunity of Mardi Gras and the people it brings out of the woodwork. I really did not see anyone, but I felt really quite sad at one point.

Thinking "here i am again, still single and searching a room for a face". Not that there is anything wrong with it but i felt like the past few months have taken to me to a place in my head, that I feel a bit odd being back in a crowded room feeling like i am 'hookering' myself to a potential somebody. Once again I am over analysing this, as always, I feel like i am the healthiest and most confident I have been in years, so I really want to a relationship to stuff that up again? My friend Robert asked if i was single to which i muttered yes into my maxi sized G&T, "Ahhhh" he said, "That's why you look so good. Being in a relationship ages you". I am not entirely confident with this statement as he has been through about 5 relationships since I met him and he still looks the same age. I have had one major and a few short brain fart relationships and now feel cyrogenically frozen with a sign around my neck 'to be thawed out when he finds a nice guy'. Am I bad to hope he hurries up as winter is coming and its cold in my freezer.

How come I become so deflated by a room full of people? Maybe I am just a person who will never meet anyone. I know i just said the love equivalent of the C word in church, but they must exist, yet they are these people are not spoken of, like tax loop holes and dandruff on shoulders. I guess to think that you possibly could never meet someone scares the hell out of us, it drags up images of dying alone with a plate of roast pork on your lap in some dive and not being found for 6 months. So understandably it is better to ignore the fact. I'd rather eyeball it and see what i am scared off, then maybe it won't be anything to fear after that. That's not quite working yet...

New Album, New Look

I just found this, it is the first image from the shoot for Madonna's new album "Hard Candy", out late April. Its pretty cool, shot by her current photographer collaborator Steven Klein, and judging from the past it could be the theme for the new album including part of her new look. Even if not, it's pretty cool anyhoo. Never guessed she would do 'oiled up athlete/boxer girl' , but its works. Her mesh undies are quite see through. This is also used for the cover of an upcoming issue of UK Dazed and Confused. Bring on April I say!

Sydney Storms

This bashed us last night. Once in 20 year storm

Noosa, sore muscles and a one big ole party

Just got back from Noosa on Sunday, which was nice. Noosa is very cool, spent 5 days lying about in the sun which was hot - 40 degrees on one day! Took a 4wd truck over to Frazer Island, what an amazing but very strange place. It is one huge 170km long sand dune in which this ancient rainforest has grown on. Pretty amazing, though the bumpy roads almost made me lose my breakfast. I have already had enough of vomity tourist trips this year thanks. I got sick before I went away but the sun and surf solved that, I think the sickness may have had something to do with the epic night out I had for my friends wedding. I was really happy to be back home in Sydney though, got a bit restless for my own bed and home.

Now I am back, I have been hitting the training pretty hard. Have two PT sessions a day a week and then still going 5 evenings a week as well, last night I thought my legs were going to turn to jelly and I was going to face plant into the Kings Cross fountain. I do feel fitter and I am starting to look like it, I think. It is hard, you are always starring at yourself everyday so it is hard to tell really. But I was aching something wicked, especially today after all those squats, dips and step ups teamed with sprinting. At least our trainer is a bit of eye candy while you collapse nose first into dog poo after 40 push ups.

Marde Gras is on Saturday and off to a pretty fun looking "Gay Bash" party on the night and I will take a couple of million pictures for you. Not paying $200 to go to the crap after party. I do not understand how the price of the tickets is justifiable. The party has no imagination to it, its so cookie cutter and dull. Same old rooms, all playing the same old crap music to all the pill'ed up shirtless throngs. Boring! What ever happened to the creativity of it all? Any ideas let me know.

I will add some Noosa pics soon.

Caught in The Ivy...

Hey, had a great night on Friday at my friends wedding in Watson’s bay. Such a great night, ended up at the new Sydney bar The Ivy dancing away till about 4am on the Astroturf dancefloor. Such an amazing place, a real mix up of French Country, 60’s Pastiche, early 70’s Latin modernism and Miami inspired open walls and ceilings. Just awesome. Not sure how the semi indoor/outdoor thing will work in winter but who cares. Very fun and there was a three headed shower in a big fake camp flower bell over the dance floor.
But due to my late night antics I have come down with a horrible cold. So feeling a bit sookie as I could not go to my Trainer today.
BUT I am off to Noosa tomorrow for 6 days. Yay! Can’t promise I will update this during my stay there, but will after. I am off to blow my nose.

A bit fed up

So tired and a bit fed up today, this week has been crazy what with work (all the stresses involved) and all the training I have been doing - I have felt really drained. it is a friends Nic and Kate's wedding tonight which will be fun, but for some reason I brought the heaviest present in the land which I struggled to work with this morning.Not making my mood for the day very good. I am, though, off to Noosa on Tuesday for a few days which will be fun. I hope the weather improves, it has truly been a miserable summer this year for Australia.
At least we have lots of water now! Silver lining, silver lining. Sigh…

My 31st Birthday

Here is a pic from my birthday. I had such a great night with my friends, very fun and about 20 cocktails of various shapes,weights and girth. You can see right down my shirt in this picture. eeerr oops...

Personal Trainer

Sorry kids, 2008 has been a real ‘rocket up the butt’ year so far and not in any fun way either. I have started my personal trainer now which is pretty amazing. It is great to know how much more you can improve on and get better at. I did not want to be cosmetically strong but actually strong so hopefully this cross training approach will go well.
I have been going pretty hard, as I have the trainer during the day twice a week and then still going to the gym 4/5 nights after work. So I have been feeling quite tired and sore but it is all good.
More and better updates soon
J